Monday, January 30, 2006
:: If you ever see this..... ::
well..been thinking about this the past few days..
i think i really did scare a friend away..
so if you ever happen to see this..
i just want to make it clear that i only wanted to be a friend..
the "couple" tee has no meaning to it..
really hope to hear from you soon!
everyone has a good and great CHINESE NEW YEAR!
Winamp playing: S.H.E - Bu Xiang Zhang Da
:: it's just me.. :: 1/30/2006 03:05:00 PM
Friday, January 27, 2006
:: how do i live... ::
still she walks in my mind..
every night before i sleep..
i see her smile..
why cant i hold her tight anymore..
why cant i kiss her goodnight anymore..
she told me she cant see herself like this forever..
but she told me she love me..
why is it so hard to just want to be with sumone that you love..
must it be this way..
aHhh!!!
is this a test..
is this what they call love..
i tried letting go..
yet she still live in my heart..
i was going so crazy..
i lost control of myself..
i really don't know when i will lost total control..
and maybe that's the day i will end it all..
maybe the day when i stop breathing..
i can see myself with her again..
maybe...
Winamp playing : Jay Chou - Yi Lu Xiang Bei
:: it's just me.. :: 1/27/2006 01:54:00 AM
Thursday, January 26, 2006
:: JB City Sqaure ::
i was asked to blog down what happened today..
here it goes..to prove i am a "hum ji kia"
ok..i been in and outta JB alot this 2 weeks..
last thurs..this mon and thurs..
well..did new year shopping with my friends..
the accompany : Cam DT Dean
they did their shoppings too..
last thurs:
went over to watch geisha and look around for clothes..
mon:
went back in to buy the clothes we all saw on last thurs..
went abit of ktv..
their ktv is so damn cheap la..
well..it all happen at levis..
dt was looking for her jeans..
and the sales personal is very friendly and helpful
at first i didnt notice her..
only until she smile..
guess what?
she got a very radiant smile..
and i like her "hu yan"!
damn cute lor..
so dt and cam brave the storms and help me to get her number!
she was like kinda taken back..
but still very friendly and gave her number..
well..she has a very nice and unique name too..
=)
hey don't think too much k..
i just wanna know her as a friend..
i still have feelings for sumone out there..
u guys know who..
haiz..
thurs:
today we went back JB to swap dear cammy's game..
of course to catch the movie fearless!
it was DAMN nice lah!
before that we went levis again!
well..i was quite embrassed to go in..
but i still did..
i was looking at tee shirts..
decided to get one for my friend..
the tees are quite nice and 2 for 89rm
so i got myself one too..
all this while she was in the store so didnt reali get to see her..
as i was walking out of the shop..
i got this crazy idea..
to give her the tee i just brought.. (worse part is couple tee!!)
dear cam and dt did me a big favour again!
hehe..
they help me gave her the tee..
and i think her colleauges tease her abit..
so damn PAI SEH lah!
ok la..and my "wor nang fei" story start..
i admit..im very "hum ji"
but i really seldom do this kinda things man..
don't know why suddenly got this kinda feel again..
well..guess was really going crazy because of what happened previously
so after the movie i went in the shop and talk to her..
told her im the one who gave her the tee..
kinda mumble through it and went off..
i aint as brave as i used to be k..
we went to slack at coffeebean after that..
and i realised i still need to get sumthing for my dearest buddy before she go back australia..
guess what?
we went back levis again!!
i was really damn PAI SEH to even walk near the shop..
so i act cool all the way..
finally got something and as i walk out..
i turn back and wanted to say bye..
but she was talking to her friend..
had eye contact for 1 sec then she turn back talking to her friend..
so i was the "WNF" once again!
lol..
and i was made to blog how "WNF" i am..
aiya..
please la..
just wanna make one friend only mah..
people please don't anyhow think k..
she's really very young lor..
and now think she too shocked till never reply my sms also..
well..end of story of the JB trips..
:: it's just me.. :: 1/26/2006 11:29:00 PM
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
:: chinese new year on the way.. ::
went JB a few times this 2 weeks..
just to check for nice and cheap clothings..
but found sumthing more rewarding..
*smile
well life's still the same through out..
i thought things will get better..
but seems like the same..
hope i can see my new hope coming soon..
she ignore my call for help..
pushing me to hell..
i found myself surrounded by darkness..
cold and wet..
shivering to my bones..
i stand alone in this strange land..
with nothing to cover myself..
naked to the storm..
i felt so weak..
how can i find my light and strength to move on...
:: it's just me.. :: 1/25/2006 01:03:00 AM
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
:: it's haunting me... ::
a trail of footprints in the sand..
as the waves come..
it wash off everything..
leaving a clean set of sand again..
but you still haunt me..
every night seems so difficult to cope..
i just cant seem to sleep..
and when i can..
bad dreams just kept coming..
when will this ever end.....
:: it's just me.. :: 1/18/2006 12:33:00 PM
Thursday, January 12, 2006
where's my route to recovery
why does it seem so mild
i am recovering aint i
but why do i still feel this pain and hurt
she caused me so much pain
physical and mental
i am the fool
just a fool
i guess she will only ring me when she need something from me..
after im of no value
i will just be dumped aside..
i cant blame anyone
that's the path i chosen
thou shall not dwell
thou shall not think
thee is heartless
but thou chosen to fall in love with thee
as the birds soar
as the time pass
thou decided to let time and rain wash off all my pains and memories..
may the rain able to do the healing..
:: it's just me.. :: 1/12/2006 02:24:00 PM
:: S.H.E 8th Jan to 10th Jan 06 ::
well these 3 days had been busy busy busy..
i hope everyone had fun
even though it was tough and tiring for all
my apologizes to all as i was knocked out during the departure
hence unable to attend
the autograph session is really something worth mentioning
everyone did thier best
and i personally believe that we did a much better job than the previous sessions they had
the focus security are really friendly and professional
i really enjoyed working with them too
the crowds are CRAZY as usual
damn so kiasu scare cannot get thier album signed!!!
i just feel like slapping thier face upside down
even though there was alot of unpredictable situation
but everyone was there to help..
the credits are to those that helped!
everyone of you!
without you guys this autograph session will never be able to work out..
thanks alot..
oh yes..not forgetting my 3 best things that happened to me on 9th Jan!
No. 1:
i saw KaiYun!!! she's the very very special lady in my life.. =) only me and her know why..hehe she's SO sweet! she brought mentos for me..and remind me not to smoke too much..thanks for her sweets..that was the only food supplement that last me thru out the whole day! love you always!!! =)
No. 2:
PEARL!!! OMGgGG! she changed so much!!! she became so pretty!!! actually ever since she joined H.I.M i have already noticed her..at that point of time everyone all say my taste weird..but at that time i already notice that she's different and i can feel that she has a very sweet soul..that's what drew me to her..now she really slim down, became so pretty, her smile every so radiant..really makes me smile too..told her that if she come down every session, i sure be present to help as well..lolx..
No. 3:
The most attitude and stylo Hebe Tian XiBi! After so long, this is the 1st time ever she took note of me! i was like OMG! i spotted her eyed me from the corners of her eyes 2 times! and the last time we went up and sign, she look straight into my eyes. it was damn exciting man!
well now i got this strong instinct that she is not straight..but not les as well..i firmly believe she is bi! my instinct damn strong one..and due to my past experience too..lolx..
so people stop agruing if she's straight or not..if you support and like her, you should respect her too! =) this is the kinda girl i always fell for, someone with a mind of her own, a little bit of attitude yet so sweet and loving! aww..best combination!
:: it's just me.. :: 1/12/2006 02:16:00 PM
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
:: isolation..... ::
i am like hiding myself away..
refusing to face the pain..
but it doesnt help..
the pain still lingers..
bad health with bad luck and bad love just hit me all together..
though i might seem to be recovering well..
there's still the root of problem to solve..
why am i isolating myself..
why am i refusing to see anyone..
why i kept blaming myself..
why did i become like this..
i just feel so useless..
i thought im crawling out of depression..
but now it seems like im falling in even more..
im confused..
i don't know what to do..
i need to find a way out..
i guess i need to clear my mind and think properly..
i think i just need time away from everything and everyone..
i hope to just vanish into thin air..
just for awhile...
:: it's just me.. :: 1/03/2006 04:04:00 PM
